HAHAHAROFLMAO

I'm having an awesome laugh and decided to share my happiness with you guys!! These jokes are hilarious - not because THEY are hilarious, but because of the fact that they ARE jokes and someone INVENTED them. That is FUNNY AS.
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An accountant certainly knows how to make money...

An Lawyer and an Accountant are sitting next to each other on a long flight from Sydney to New York. The Lawyer leans over to the Accountant and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Accountant just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch some sleep. The Lawyer persists and explains that the game is really easy and a lot of fun. He explains 'I ask you a question , and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.' Again, the Accountant politely declines and tries to get some sleep.

The Lawyer, now somewhat agitated, says 'OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $50!' This catches the Accountant's complete attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Lawyer asks the first question. 'What's the distance from the earth to the moon?' The Accountant doesn't say a word, reaches in to his wallet, pull out a five-dollar bill and hands it to the Lawyer.

Now, it's the Accountant's turn. He asks the Lawyer: 'What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?' The Lawyer looks at him with a puzzled look. He thinks long and hard. Then he takes out his laptop and searches all his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the Net, the Library and Wikapedia. Frustrated, he sends E-mails to all his co-workers and friends. All to no avail. After four hours of searching for an answer, he wakes the Accountant and hands him $50. The Accountant politely takes the $50 and turns away to get back to sleep.

The Lawyer, now getting annoyed, shakes the Accountant and asks, 'Wake up, so what IS the answer?' Without a word, the Accountant reaches into his wallet, hands the Lawyer $5, then turns and goes back to sleep.


...although occassionally not in an ethical way!

A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for an accountant.

His friend asks, "Didn't your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?"

The businessman replies, "Yep, that's the accountant we're all looking for!"
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Dean had just completed his first year of an accounting degree and decided to get some accounting-related work experience in the summer holidays. He applied for various positions in accounting, accounts receivable and accounts payable but was not having much luck as he had no experience.

Then he received a call from the accounts receivable manager at MultiCorp who had been very impressed with the young lad's enthusiasm. The manager had a particularly tough account - EasyBuild. This customer was particularly slow to pay their bills and was said to owe a lot of money to many suppliers in town. The manager at MultiCorp promised Dean that if he was able to collect at least half the money owed by this slow-paying customer, he'd get a job for the whole summer vacation.

In less than two hours, Dean came back with the entire outstanding amount. "That's amazing!" the manager said. "We've been trying to get him to pay us for weeks. How did you do it?" "It was easy," Dean replied. "I told him if he didn't pay me right now, I'd go tell all his other creditors that he had heaps of money and just paid every cent of our outstanding invoices."
and the funny thing is...the next part goes:
"I don't get this joke... (please explain)" and then you click on it and it tells you:
I don't get this joke...
EasyBuild seems to be having serious financial problems and can't pay the money owing to their many creditors. The young man has presented EasyBuild with a choice. Option 1: pay MultiCorp the outstanding amount owed and he will go away. If they don't pay then the young man will go around town telling all the other creditors he WAS paid (even though he wasn't) and that EasyBuild has plenty of money. The other creditors will then want their payments too and will start harrassing the company for cheques. The company does not want to face pressure from all their other creditors so is happy to pay MultiCorp just to keep the young man quiet.
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HAHAHA.

I AM SO BORED/OUT OF MY MIND ITS SO FUNNY! LOL!

There are more jokes but I'll just go read them now and laugh quietly to myself...no need to bore you guys. :D

P.S. I have slightly edited the image:
http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b158/krazedrealitii/tquads2.jpg